Right

Hello, dear reader. I know that a lot of people know know me actually read my blog and that has amazed me. I was kinda shocked when my friend just told me that he actually knew my blog before I shared it. Well, it sort of made me feel happy somehow, you know, that kind of feeling when your friend takes the initiative to know you. It's an honor to me. Alright, I should stop expressing my feeling here. 

Back to my real life story, I'm having a real stress currently. Seeing so many people who're so successful in life, being all-rounded and having their very own talents and stuff like that. Whenever I think about this, I'll start to evaluate myself if I'm a person who builds the confidence in God or things. I have no idea where to think about it. It's somehow a bad thing.

Let me talk about my progress of reading, it's still quite hard for me to read and focus. I find no interest in doing things. Sometimes, things are just meaningless for me. Like a lot of time, I just don't understand how people find what they like in their lives and how they actually transform the passion into a field for them to explore. Like what my friend once shared, 'I know everything, but I'm good at nothing'. I don't know if I'm at the right pathway. 

This makes me think of what happened this afternoon during CF. 'Who makes decisions in you life?' My answer was God, and is God and will be God. I feel that the reason of why I'm Emily and doing all these stuff is because of God. He makes my life this way. It's very obvious when He actually wants you to do this but not that. It's hardly to be explained, you can only know what I mean when you really experience it yourself. 

My eyes are almost close. I need to take a shower and do some maths questions now. I have to be hardworking and work for God. I can't just simply go with my feelings and desires. Everything takes time to do. 'Now, time is the only limiting factor'. This was what my Physics teacher told me, it made me love physics so much. 

I need a lot more quiet time to think and figure out things that happen around me. I don't wanna be too innocent. My friend said that I actually have all sort of thoughts inside my brain. Well, I don't know, it might be wrong, who knows? 

How sure are you that you're on the right track? Taken by me, in Nottingham. 

With love,
Emily
13/02/2015